Thursday, February 23, 2012

My heart is stretching...

"Adoption means you grew in her heart instead of her tummy"

Waiting is.....HARD.
I didn't know how difficult this time was going to be. Everyone told me that this was the hard part but I think I had that absolutely optimistic thought that we would be one of couples that had the crazy story of adopting immediately. It has only been two months since we were placed on the website as a waiting family but I told Dave that it feels longer cause I've been waiting for a child for 5 years. I'm asking Jesus to continue to teach me about His heart for adoption and to teach me everything that I need to know during this time. One cool thought that keeps coming to my mind is that JESUS was adopted! How cool is that? 
I pray for every one of the other waiting couples on the website as often as possible. I pray for the birth family of our child. I pray for our child. I pray for us to know how to love this new little one that is coming soon to our lives!
Last night as I was lying in bed I was overcome with this fear of trying to love another child.  Not just ANY child, our child, our adopted child. I couldn't stop thinking about how we have been three peas in a pod for so long and that it was going to be so difficult to add another. I was bawling and saying out loud that I didn't know if I could do this! I had the coolest experience because the Holy Spirit totally came to my mind with the voice of MY Mommy! He brought comfort to me just like my mom so often does when fear strikes again!  He comforted my heart by reminding me that this child that will be added to our family will only cause there to be MORE love and joy. Our hearts will actually grow larger and have more room for love when our baby comes home! My heart is already stretching. And just like any muscle that is stretching, it feels good and bad at the same time!

Dear Baby,
We are getting prepared. Even in our doubts and fears- Father is reminding us how you absolutely fit, like a puzzle piece, with the Powers family. Praying for you, dear one.
This heart stretching Momma. <3